JP Alumni Fellow Story: Bianca Scott

The 2023-2024 Jeremiah Program Alumni Fellows, each many years removed from their time as JP moms, are using their experiences, expertise, and stories to advocate for other single moms and their families. This is Bianca Scott’s story.

Growing up, I remember wanting more for my life than what I saw around me, but I didn’t have a road map to follow. So I started out by learning what not to do from the mistakes of those around me. When I became a mother, that feeling of wanting more became more intensified, and I knew that I would have to reinvent myself to become someone different and ultimately separate who I was from my environment and the mindset I was living in. I believe my burning desire to elevate my life provided a clear path forward, and knowledge and opportunities began to present themselves to me — the Jeremiah Program being a pivotal step on that path.

During my first year in JP, I became a reader for the first time in my life, consuming over 50 books on personal development. One of the first and most impactful books I read was The Psychology of High Self-Esteem. In reading this book I was forced to confront many of my traumas from childhood and really sit with the impact those traumas had on me and how I viewed myself and the world. One of the exercises in this book was particularly difficult and painful but facilitated a crucial breakthrough for me. This exercise focused on inner child work.

During this exercise, I visualized a conversation with my child self. As I got deep into the visualization, I remembered the feelings I had as a child, and it was a feeling that I still felt and it was fear: fear of being hurt, fear of not being smart enough, and an overwhelming fear that I would not be accepted. As the vision of my child self became clearer, I saw how shy and reserved I looked and afraid that this person I was looking at (the adult me) was going to be mean or try to hurt me. In that moment, I had the realization that I had a deep feeling of being unloved, unprotected, and unvalued. I felt like I was nothing and worthy of nothing. I looked my child self in the eye and told her that she can trust me, I will protect her, I am here to love her, and I will never let her down. I sat there on the edge of my bed hugging my child self and cried, thinking about all the pain that that child endured and feeling so overwhelmed with joy that I could be the one that saved her. That experience was a major step in my healing because I felt empowered to love and protect that child. Now I had two babies, and I was determined not to let either of them down. That commitment lit a fire in me and it motivates and propels me forward still to this day.

I didn’t know it at the time, but living at the JP campus would be a catalyst to not only my journey of self-improvement but also my journey of self-discovery, self-healing, and self-love. It allowed me the space, time, and stillness to lay the foundation for my change in mindset and, ultimately, my life.

My hope is that I can use my experiences to give back to my community of moms who are on a journey like mine.

As I continued to read more books and listen to podcasts, I slowly but surely started to reprogram my mind and see myself and my potential in a completely different light. All of a sudden, I felt like I deserved success and believed that I had what it takes to achieve whatever I decided to. My dreams started getting bigger and my confidence grew, and everything that I had asked for started to come to fruition. It was like my eyes were open and I could see myself, and all I wanted to do was share what I had learned, and I started with my daughter. Everything I learned I taught her, from daily affirmations and mirror self-talk to goal setting and practicing daily self-love.

As I reflect, I feel so much gratitude and pride because I have come far and have accomplished so many of my goals, but the truth is I am still on that journey to elevate and become an even better version of myself. I’ve learned that having success, self-love, confidence, and joy is not a one-and-done thing; it’s a continuous journey with peaks and valleys. But now the lows, rather than breaking me, have taught me the importance of constant growth, learning, and the power in trusting yourself. Life hasn’t been easy, but it has been beautiful. I’ve learned that you can become someone you never thought possible, but you have to put in the work on yourself to make space for growth and the magic to happen. I’m a firm believer in the power of a positive mindset, and I’ve been teaching my daughter to dream big. Now I’m living proof that those dreams can come true.

My journey has been a testament to the power of resilience, resourcefulness, patience, and gratitude. Resilience in the commitment to continue on no matter what while believing that you win. Resourcefulness in asking for help and being committed to finding a way. Patience with myself to understand that I don’t have to be perfect — as the saying goes, progress over perfection. And gratitude for life, the good, the bad, and the ugly. I survived, I’ve healed, I’ve grown. I feel gratitude for love, love for my daughter, love for myself, and the love that I’m surrounded by. Gratitude in KNOWING that the universe is on my side.

Society often tells single mothers that we must sacrifice our dreams or that we shouldn’t strive for the highest levels of success. Poverty and racial stereotypes can make it even more challenging for single mothers to believe in themselves. Add in abuse, trauma, and low self-esteem, and it can feel impossible to break free from these narratives. I challenge this narrative every day by being an example of how far one can rise and how beautiful life can be when you believe in yourself and do the work of uprooting old mindsets that don’t serve you; you can become the creator of your own story.

I challenge anyone reading this to look in the mirror every day and talk to yourself about your dreams, read or listen to 10 pages of a self-development book a day, write down your dreams and goals, tell yourself, “I love you,” and try to find gratitude in everything. I believe with my whole heart that when you do this, the next step will be made clear and the universe will open to you in ways you never imagined.

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